A tribute to 'ze knees' - Thanks :)

After 3 months of being on sturdy ground, my owner has decided to mix it up a bit.

Within hours, I am shoved into the most uncomfortable attire and placed on two long planks.

The new "design" of shoe strains and twists my ever gentle self into a ludicrous and burning position. If the stance isn't enough, she now subjects me to never ending bumps and turns -

constantly changing the direction.

When my intolerance is about to topple, she loosens the grip around me and I have a chance to breathe. After half and hour or so, I begin to feel like myself again, un-cramped and grounded.

Then... the warden does it again, if nothing else, much worse.

I am now facing some of the biggest 'bumps' of my life and holding my breath to just to keep up.

The jarring, the bouncing, the twisting... is she trying to kill me?

What's worse, is the speed - flying past, border line out of control,

I think I am going to be sick.

The burn permeates my muscles and I force her to stop.

Please... just stop you mad woman!

She listen, leans forwards and I, again, falsely feel the release.

Seconds, maybe a minute passes by -

then we begin again.

The rest of the day is a wild ride, complete with mountain, boulders and inclines.

I hold on for dear life, trying to stay in one piece.

She's kind though and treats me with a warm bath at the end of the day.

The pain subsides as she doses me up with anti-inflammatories and strong liquor.

I don't mind her today,

but we will have to wait and see what she throws at me tomorrow to see if I can keep it together.