peaks and troughs

In a panic and a fluster,

she hastily makes the call.

The voice on the other end reassures her...

offers some simple advice.

The conversation ends and she tries to take control,

another phone call and appointment,

a cup of coffee and a muffin...

things appear calmer. For now.

Torn by location she drifts in between homes,

questioning the benefits in both.

Testing friendships make things hard,

non-comitted men can make it unbearable.

And so she finds herself this way.

Torn not just by location,

but by of making the difficult decisions.

The tumultuous journey she's on,

will no doubt tether out,

but the ride is a difficult one to watch.

The phone calls and advice,

the postcards and patience,

can seem so irrelevant when so far away.

Torn to protect her from the journey,

or let her experience the peaks or troughs,

I just want her to be ok.

north hampton nothingness

one of the many clocks chime and the house murmers in agreement.

the fire burning slowly, begins to gradually fade and the night lights create a path down the hallway.

creeping inside, content after a hearty meal and sufficient few bottles of wine, we giggle towards our bedrooms.

whispering stories of the night and plans for tomorrow, Charlie and I part our ways.

turning back the covers and ready for bed, I smile as a hot water bottle greets me.

new Irish family have a way of making you feel as if you belong...treated as one of their own.

a lie in for the morning, i rise to the smell of fresh coffee.

we watch the final of the aussie open like tiny children under heavy covers.

chattering incessantly... we even managed to have porridge in bed for breakfast.

no time restrains or deadlines our only rule for the weekend.

a road trip through the countryside,

another little pub meal and i feel like a small town woman.

despite the looming monday blues, we explore fields and little castles like we have no concerns.

only on the trivia playing train trip does our 'north hampton nothingness' seems like an exotic vacation.

we depart off the tube,

always sad to see another weekend end too quickly.

a weekend of winding down truly feels like a country retreat.

angela's irish home made bread,

vincent's lasagna with meat,

john's irish sayings and accent making me laugh

and charlies priceless companionship...

i imprint this moment in my mind,

reminding myself how blessed i am to be here and know this woman as my friend.

not so bad

They cajole around me, some towering above and others linking with my arm.

'Are you teaching us miss?' they ask with anticipation and a cheeky grin.

'Nah guys I'm sorry... I've even got a free so you know that I'd love to.'

'Oh nah miss, she's got no sense of umour!!'

'I'm sorry... you just go and behave. Try and have fun yeah'.

They start 'acting to cry', thinking it will persuade me.

And although I laugh, I secretly feel for them and wish I was going with them.

As a class, they start gently pushing me along with them towards the hall.

Laughing and chatting about them 'taking ova'.

These year 9's were once the hardest to teach, often ending with me walking out and feeling like I'd accomplished nothing.

They'd challenge me with their attitudes and madness - only wanting to play games and muck around.

Over time it changed, only ever so slightly but noticeable for me.

From pure hatred of the subject and the teacher, to coming to class and sometimes listening.

Chaos still reigned but it was organised and somewhat controlled.

A year later and the rapport has been strengthened again - all because of a change of teacher.

Now they realise that 'miss wasn't so bad yea?!'

I see them now in the atrium or hall, mostly the stairways where they are slowly making their way to class.

On the off chance when I teach them, be it history or maths, we have a laugh and an understanding that we're alright.

They now make me laugh and smile, like I have a place in this school.

That I have, despite the madness, made a difference in some students' life.

Bless this vivaciously manic, yet wonderfully kind group of people.